Walking along the road after nightfall, I thought all at once of London streets, and by a freak of mind, wished I were there. I saw the shining of shop-fronts, the yellow glistening of a wet pavement, the hurrying people, the cabs, the omnibuses -- and I wished I were amid it all.
What did it mean, but that I wished I were young again? Not seldom I have a sudden vision of a London street, perhaps the dreariest and ugliest, which for a moment gives me a feeling of home-sickness. Often it is the High Street of Islington, which I have not seen for a quarter of a century, at least; no thoroughfare in all London less attractive to the imagination, one would say; but I see myself walking there -- walking with the quick, light step of youth, and there, of course, is the charm. I see myself, after a long day of work and loneliness, setting forth from my lodging. For the weather I care nothing; rain, wind, fog -- what does it matter! The fresh air fills my lungs; my blood circles rapidly; I feel my muscles, and have a pleasure in the hardness of the stone I tread upon. Perhaps I have money in my pocket; ! am going to the theatre, and afterwards, I shall treat myself to supper -- sausage and mashed potatoes, with a pint of foaming ale. The gusto with which I look forward to each and every enjoyment! At the pit-door, I shall roll and hustle amid the throng, and find it amusing. Nothing tires me. Late at night, I shall walk all the way back to Islington, most likely singing as I go. Not because I am happy -- nay, I am anything but that; but my age is something and twenty; I am strong and well.
夜幕降临之后,我沿着大路散步,突然想起了伦敦的街道,并且产生了一个古怪的想法:希望我是在那里。展现在我眼前的,是华丽的店铺门面、潮湿的人行道上闪烁的黄色光芒、熙来攘往的人群,以及川流不息的车辆一一我真希望自己就在它们中间。
这是代表着什么?难道是我想重回年轻时代?我常常会突然想起伦敦的街道,或许是最沉寂、最丑陋的街道,它会使我一时半刻沉湎于思乡的惆怅之中。我最常想起的是伊斯灵顿大街,我已经至少有二十五年没有看到它了。也许有人会说,在伦敦所有的街道中,它是最难以激发人们想象力的那一条;但我却看到自己走在那条街上一一迈着只有年轻人才拥有的轻快步伐,我认为它的魅力恰恰就在于此。我看到自己在一整天漫长的辛劳和孤独之后,从住所里走出来。我并不在意天气如何,下雨、刮风、起雾一一又有什么关系呢!我的肺部充满了新鲜的空气;我的血液快速地流动;我感受到自己有力的肌肉,走在坚硬的石头路面上也让我感到愉快。我的口袋里也许还有些钱;我正走向剧院,然后我会请自己吃晚餐——香肠和马铃薯泥,再来一品脱泡沫丰富的淡色啤酒。我带着由衷的喜悦期待着每一种享受!在玻璃门前,我在人群之中摇晃、推挤着,这让我感到十分有趣。没有什么能使我疲倦。夜半时分,我一路走回伊斯灵顿大街,很可能还一边高声歌唱。我并不是因为快乐才如此的——不,那时的我根本就不快乐;只是因为我年轻,只有二十岁,强壮而且健康。
Put me in a London street this chill, damp night, and I should be lost in barren discomfort. But in those old days, if I am not mistaken, I rather preferred the seasons of bad weather; I had, in fact, the true instinct of townsfolk, which finds pleasure in the triumph of artificial circumstance over natural conditions, delighting in a glare and tumult of busy life under hostile heavens which, elsewhere, would mean shivering ill-content. The theatre, at such a time, is doubly warm and bright; every shop is a happy harbour of refuge -- there, behind the counter, stand persons quite at their ease, ready to chat as they serve you; the supper bars make tempting display under their many gasjets; the public houses are full of people who all have money to spend. Then clangs out the piano-organ -- and what could be cheerier!
I have much ado to believe that I really felt so. But then, if life had not somehow made itself tolerable to me, how should I have lived through those many years? Human creatures have a marvellous power of adapting themselves to necessity. Were I, even now, thrown back into squalid London, with no choice but to abide and work there - should I not abide and work? Notwithstanding thoughts of the chemist's shop, I suppose I should.
如果现在将我在这样寒冷潮湿的夜晚放到伦敦街头,我会极为难受且不知所措。在过去的日子里,如果我没记错的话,我更喜欢天气恶劣的季节。实际上,我具有纯粹的城镇居民的天性,能在人造环境战胜自然条件的胜利中找到乐趣,会为在气候恶劣的天空下显赫、喧器、忙碌地生活而感到高兴;而这样的天空,在别处是会使人极度不满的。在那样的时候,剧院里总是更为温暖、明亮;所有的店铺都是幸福的避风港一一在柜台的后面,闲适自在的人们随时准备为你效劳,与你攀谈;餐馆将诱人的美味佳肴陈列于明亮的煤气灯下;酒吧里挤满了前去挥霍的人;还有手摇风琴奏出的乐曲一一还有什么比这更令人愉悦呢!
我费尽力气才相信我真是如此感觉的。然而,如果生活并没有以某种方式让我感觉可以忍受它,我又怎么能熬过那么多年呢?人这种生物有一种极为了不起的、适应困境的能力。甚至是现在,如果将我扔回到肮脏破败的伦敦,让我只能在那里生活和工作,除此之外别无选择——我会停止生活和工作吗?虽然想到了药店,但我想我还是会随遇而安的。
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