上面的例子中,中文导游词先介绍修建古寨的目的,然后具体介绍其在明末农民战争中的用途。其介绍条理、清晰,能够满足中国人的审美标准。而其翻译中却出现了一些问题,如第一句“In the old time, people built castles for the purpose of defence”中出现了“people built castles”,然后在第四句中译文再次出现“people built castles”,给人拖沓累赘之感,这显然不符合英语导游词简洁的行文风格。建议改为:
At the end of Ming dynasty, people built castles for the purpose of defence,because uprisings happened constantly then. Once there was a fight,people would be sheltered in the castles, in which were enough water, food,and aims. So the practicality was more important than appreciation.
6.套译法
套译法即把汉语导游词的含义套用英语熟语。如:中国翻译协会近年来曾先后举办了两次研讨会,以确定“桂林山水甲天下”的最佳译文。其中著名应用翻译家、北京理工大学珠海分院教授吴伟雄的参赛译稿“East or West, Guilin Landscape is best”荣获大赛金奖。此后中国翻译协会再次组织专家献计献策,提出了“By water, by mountains,most lovely, Guilin” 的译法。这些译法诗意盎然,形象传神,文学色彩浓厚。