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ニ、表达简洁顺畅,避免重复累赘
汉语表达中往往重复关键性名词,很少用代词。如果在英译文中也采用这种表达习惯,就会使行文重复累赘。试将下面这段汉语译成英语:
“你要求在896地区进行现场调查,调查的目的是为了确定水面的深度。这项调查已经由塞缪尔•斯科特和我进行过了,我们钻了几个测试孔,钻孔深达20英尺。”
这段语如果按汉语顺序、结构,可能会译为:You requested that a sight investigation be carried out on the area 896. The purpose of the investigation was to determine the depth of water table. The investigation has been made by Samuel Scott and myself. We sank several test holes, drilling them to a depth of 20 feet.
在这段译文中investigation —同出现了三次,而且这段话的主要意思并不明确。试比较下面译文:
As you requested,Samuel Scott and I have investigated area 896 to determine the depth of the water level. We drilled several test holes to a depth of 20 feet.
这段译文不但精练筒洁,避免了重复,而且重点突出,突出了这段话的主要意思---进行了调查,以及如何调查的。
三、重点突出,主次分明
把科技文章译成英文时,要注意分清原文内容的主次关系,以便在译文中把重要内容安排在主结构,而把次要内容放在附属结构如从句和各种短语。试比较下面几组译文:
(1)最近ー篇文章说,在1950年之前,那里的锰矿已经开采到了祜竭的地歩。
A recent article makes the statement that beiore 1980 the reserves of manganese had been exploited to the point of depletion.
这个译文应按句子内容的主次关系改译如下;
According to a recent article,Cuban reserves of manganese there had been exploited almost to the point of depletion before 1950.
(2) 必须要预料到,化工厂邻近的居民会提出抗议。 这句话可以有两种译法:
a) It must be expected that there wll be complaints from the people who live an the neighbourhood of the chemical plant.
b) Complaints from the people who live in the neighbourhood of the chemical plant must be expected.
第二种译法把主要内容安排在句子的主要结构,更符合原义, 也更为简练,不过不如前者勻称。